Since you guys seem to enjoy defecation humor, here's a comprehensive list of different types of shits. My favorites are:
THE CROWD PLEASER - A shit is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you have to show it to someone before flushing.
THE GROANER - A shit so huge it cannot exit without vocal assistance.
THE FLOATER - Characterized by its floatability, this shit has been known to resurface after many flushings.
THE PEEK-A-BOO SHIT - Now you see it, now you don't. This shit is playing games with you. Requires patience and muscle control.
THE "I THINK I'M GIVING BIRTH THROUGH MY ASSHOLE" SHIT - Similar to the Lincoln Log and The Spinal Tap Shits. The shape and size of the turd resembles a tall boy beer can. Vacuous air space remains in the rectum for some time afterwards.
THE "WHAT THE HELL DIED IN HERE?" SHIT - Also sometimes known as The Toxic Dump. Of course, you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odor. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for air.
THE "I JUST KNOW THERE'S A TURD STILL DANGLING THERE" SHIT - You sit there patiently, waiting for the last cling-on to fall because if you wipe now, it's just going to smear all over the place.
8 hours ago