So a few days into the popcorn sales drive, I look at my email to see who bought popcorn, and all I see are the usual suspects - friends and family. No poker players. I know things have been tough with FT and AP/UB shutting down, Cake taking months to process a cashout and with people scrambling to get money off of Merge. But is it going to kill you to buy a lousy $22 box of popcorn (includes postage) to help a bunch of cub scouts?Perhaps in my quest for humor, I played down my poker skills a tad too much. Perhaps I may have undersold the value of my database coaching. Come around... sit by the fire while I tell you a story... A week ago while I was playing a bunch of tables, I notice some chatter on one of the tables. A casual player was saying that I WORKED for Merge Poker because I played so many tables and played "perfectly" - like I knew what all the cards were. Always made the right fold and always put in money ahead. He didn't say that about any other reg at the table - just yours truly. This really happened. A testimonial... from a fish! And who knows how many *countless* people are thinking that. You too can get a *chance* to glean such knowledge from the Master... all for the low price of $22. Quack quack.
Seriously - no poker player's bought any, so you may get free coaching for as little as $22 (and an awesome box of popcorn - 18 microwaveable packs inside). I personally prefer the microwaveable kettle corn for $25 - it's a little sweeter.How many times have you and your lady friend been sitting around with nothing to do after a romantic interlude? Smoking is so 1981. Popcorn is the post-coital silence-filler of the new millennium. And when the time comes for her to take the walk of shame... what more thoughtful way than with a bag of popcorn? There's also a light version ($22), in case she needs to lose a few.
So to summarize:
* box of 18 tasty microwaveable bags of popcorn for $22-25 ($2 more for delivery confirmation)* impress the ladies with your sensitivity to the needs of little cub scouts
* a chance to win a database read of your game, worth at least $500 (and waaay more if you are a weaker reg in the games)
Here is a link to the catalog. You can also send a popcorn donation to our military troops or buy pre-popped popcorn (white chocolate, carmamel, toffee, cheddar). Don't order online - the prices are higher and the shipping and handling is a rip-off. I'll have G send it to you (along with a hand-written thank you note) via priority mail. The prices above include shipping and handling. And as an added bonus, I'll take Merge transfers (Carbon and Lock) as payment! I just saw it trade at 70 cents. That's like getting a 30% discount on the popcorn! Act now! Send an email to doubleflypoker@gmail.com with your name and address, and your perferred form of payment.
Not into popcorn? I'll add another item to the Poker-Master raffle later in the week.









Get over yourself! All that promotion and nada! Guess you dont have as much pull as you think in the poker "community". Its all about the fucking money for you - you snidey money hungry monkey. I wouldnt be surprised if its not your kid selling the popcorn and you are just looking for a way to make more $$$.
ReplyDeleteLOL. Hi Whale. :-)
ReplyDeleteHow long does your kid have to sell the popcorn? Will you keep us updated on how many boxes you've sold to poker players? Popcorn is meh. I want the database review! I'm a winning 25nl player and losing 50nl player...wtf?!?!
ReplyDeleteGood luck!
I think he has until some time early next month to sell the popcorn. Considering I've only sold 5 boxes of popcorn to poker players so far, I think it's +++ev for you to just buy a box. Did I mention I made 5K the other day playing poker? ;-)
ReplyDelete